the dress

i want a dress that would fit me like a glove , a dress to make me look chic and a dress to make me feel confident ... i have not worn a dress for many years ..

the last dress i had was put into my closet because i was too shy to wear one and all of a sudden, here i am once again ... the dress bug bit me and i found the right material to make one ..


this morning i spent half the day with my parents ...travelling all the way to puncak alam and mind you , once upon a time i did not know that this place even existed until we move to shah alam ... even then , and now i get chills when i hear puncak alam ... however my doubts were all cleared when i went there to oversee a school and the journey was breathtaking .. and then they say the rest was history as my tailor lives there ..


back to the dress .. its a beautiful black piece of material .. black for Xmas ? it's the colour for every season and as far as i know every girl needs a little black dress of their own ......


i kept telling myself that i will be brave this year and for the coming years to come and that i will make a dress for myself ... i am not backing out .. just can't cos i told my friend what and how it should look like ... nervous yes but i am waiting for it to be ready ....

so , with my head held up high , i am going to get into that dress of mine .

space

not the space as in outer space .. space as in .. hey i need space ... how is it with some people that they never need space ? everything has been mapped out for them and all they do is , it's OK actually and the next day when they wake up , they just fall into that space and it's OK ..


i mean why not everything has been thought of by someone else rather than yourself ... i mean don't they get to a point where they'd go .. 'hey , i need space so just back off '!!!.

don't they feel being pushed to the ground and it's just super fine .. i mean everything just goes on monotonously and not even a bump and they are OK with it ?

i used to wonder, and for me, if i am being pushed against the wall , i would just stop and say , 'now , hold on a minute , i need space , back off'. the gist is ,after saying how you need that space , some don't even bother to hear you .. and i wonder why .


so ,instead of being pushed against the wall , I'd just say , 'stop just right there ,you're not doing this to me'.

.. i bid you farewell ....

.. now it's time to say goodbye , to all of my one sweet potato class ..... with the trophy given out today at the eleventh hour to which i must say .. to the penduduk of paya jaras .. you guys sure knows how to test a driver's patience ... all was not too late .. i got back in time to see big smiles as i handed out the trophies and yes i will miss my students very much ....


as i sat down to list down the class list for next year , i can't help but to wonder how is next year going to be .. perhaps that all of us learned good lessons for this year and we have grown ... in one way or another .. maybe our students feel the same way with new schooling environment and new friends to keep up with ...


the feeling of loneliness creeps up to me as once again the school will be very quiet. for now everything is silent and we hope that, the silence would soon be replaced with new students and not to mention crying students .. our journey will begin soon .. a new beginning .. a new journey and a new path ...

all i can say is , my teachers and i have truly enjoyed our year with these students and we wish them all the best ..