i dont care but i'd be lying ..

I don't care anymore is what I tell myself . It's hurting to hear from others about you and I don't even know . I don't care now . We know so little and yet we are related . I just don't care anymore .... yeah call it emo but it's what I go through when I hear others speak of you and I never knew it .

It hurts that we are close and yet so far apart . I don't care and I don't wanna try hard . I will let it be ... it's not that I don't respect you . You mean a lot to me . It's okay Ijust don't care . Not even a meaningful conversation and there I go and spoil it all . Enough said , I don't care ..

Why ? Has it been so , tell me , why ?

What happen ? All I can say is it's me and not you . It's just pain hard .. Is it that I don't understand ? Or perhaps I am just shallow for you .. Jealous ? Never ..

Okay , I will lay off , I will keep quiet ... Just be true to yourself and express yourself .

Quiet , quiet .Shhhh , Shhh

Quiet , quiet shhhh... shhhhh !!!!!!!!
It's very quiet .
No more screaming;
No more yells;
No more 'I hate yous"
All is very quiet .

Quiet , quiet , shhhhhh .. shhhhh !!!!
No more banging on the table ;
No more squeals of laughter;
No more saying ' Teacher , he hit me.'


Quiet , quiet , shhhhh .. shhhhh !!!!
No more fuss;
No more buzz;
No more anything for now it's quiet .

The Ride .. of my life

So it has been that .... since I was so into learning new things , I got my friend J to sign up for what was to come .. Let's start from the beginning ..


Both J and I were actually looking into some courses that might just catch our eye . We found one and the price was also right and .. we are allowed to pay in installment basis .. With the payments out of our hair ..... thus our long awaited journey began .

See, we have been getting up like 5 in the morning just so that we could get the first ride from the KTM station to town ... the first day was very exciting for me ... not for J .. for me because it was my first ride with KTM and hence the ever loving LRT which we have come to love ..

It was dark when we arrived there at the KTM station .. yeah real jakun la .. We got on the train and everyting smelled nice , fresh and cool ... Me being me, I followed J like a lost puppy however , after the 10 days of intensive training ... not the course mind you ... it's intensive training , training me to get the KTM train and make the connecting ride to Pasar Seni , I will be a certified traveller .. minus the certificate ..

That is okay too .. I was having fun and enjoying the rides untill that day . That day was the saddest day for us . We got on the KTM to get backt to Sg. Buloh and boy , were we upset , it's okay too right .. We got out of the coah and we smelled .... I will not elaborate okay , you guys know what I am talking about ..

No ammount of perfume could get rid of the smell on me .. I had 3 showers yup 3 just to get rid of it ... well welcome to the real world ...

The New ONe

In my wildest dreams , I never thought that one day I would be a principal . All my life I worked as a teacher and being a principal was only for people who were smart , elegant , qualified and I was never one of those .

I have no idea as to where I am leading myelf or even for the teachers who are under my charge . However , I have come to meet some nice teachers along the way and they have been nice towards me .... I guess I need a chance to proove to myself and others who are depending heavily on me .

I plan to take one day at a time and make mistakes , after all I am only human .. and all of these would not have been possible without the Almighty above . I asked for a small sign and he choosed to show me the big picture .

It is official now , I have no mixed feelings about anything .. I just don't know why and I am not even freaking out . I don't know what will I face next year but all I do no is there are people depending on me and I cannot let them down .. So for 2010.. watch out here I come !!

School's Out

So here is the thing .. for eleven months , I have been asking myself this ; will I see the last day of the schooling session ? Yes and Yes .. Okay that is great .. YOu know how some kids just try to drive you up the wall and you may feel that you may never want to come down form that wall ?

Well , as of yesterday those kids are finally leaving me ... You heard right , LEAVING ME ... So do I miss them ? Wait ............... yes .............. and ................ no !!!!! Kidding !!!

Take R for example ; and here how the conversation went ,
ME : R , you are finally leaving me .. ( me smiling , feeling on top of the world )
R : Quiet ,however in her mind , this was what she was thinking ( yeah it's great , leaving , having a looser teacher like you !!)
Me : R , I will miss you too , it has been a great year and we got on so well ....
R: In your dreams , teacher , in your dreams !!!!!!!!

Okay R , I have been behind your back and watching you like a hawk .. and I will miss you no matter what .. and for the last time class ,

'Thank you children ',

'Thank you teacher Audra , bye bye teacher Audra .. see you on Monday ... '

'There's no more Monday children , you're leaving me .. go give your new teachers headache now !'

Like I said , it was the best year ever , and I will miss all of you ...
Till then my babaies ... good luck ..

Work N moere work .. which is ?

Most would say that it is good to keep busy but then again .. being a teacher , what kind of busy do I have to be busy with ? I mean , I am just a kindy teacher and being a kindy teacher , you just do simple work and sing songs ..

Not anymore ... being a teacher has eveloved ... yup . Yesterday I spent a whole day in Putra Jaya and like one big jakun , that was my first trip ... with all the oohhsss and ahhhhss coming from me , I was pretty impressed but after the taklimat I just wasn't .

My mood was not there and after the taklimat , my mood just went out of the window for good .... that was just a tiny bit .. the journey back to school was like forever .... I miss my students . Before my friend could actually stop the car , I was already out ...

I missed them so much even I was only away for a few hours .. and today we had another meeting to attend to and I was kinda sad that I could not be with them again ... to which Miss Smarty pants said this to me , " Teacher , kalau lah saya tau teacher ada meeting , saya takkan datang la teacher ". I was so sad , I mean she had a point .. But i told her I will make it up to them .... tomorrow

So if this is not work then what ?

salam salam, kelam -kabut

You know , when in your mind you have everything worked out and then when the moment arrives you get all kelam kabut ? Now , why does thid just happens to me ? I bet it's just me while everyone else just breezes through ...

It's always me , and no one else . So , how do I get rid of it ? Maybe I would just have to climb the highest mountain or just sing ' Climb Every Mountain ', from the one hit wonder movie .... what's it called ? JAndrews starred in it ...... yeah Sound Of MUsic .

But I guess it's just one of a kind type of kelam kabut la ... so as of today , I will fervently say a prayer before I do anything ... amen.


Okay let's now talk about , it's raining men .. How nice right ? So will I be kelam kabut when it rains men ? I mean cat and dogs never drop from the sky when it rains cats and dogs and yes , it's just a saying .

the new ostrich in class

Yup , we have a pet and it's an ostrich . Oh , it's huge .. and it's shy .. So why do I have an ostrich in my class ?

Today was a funny day , as usual .. I am so popular that I often have to make rounds to the other side of the building .. the admin building . And there I was , trying to do Pemahaman with a bunch of six year olds and I had difficulty in fahaming the story . It was a simple story -- Buah Durian .

My throat hurts , it feels like a thousand knives going through it .. my nose was runny , I was cranky and I just WANTED TO GO HOME , but I can't because my dear friend was not feeling well , so that was why I was in her class. Oh , but they were good . As I tried to explain the menaing ' King Of Fruit ' , smarty pants insisted that I stopped whatever that I was saying because he wanted to go to the toilet .

To the toilet he did go and I carried on .. that wasn't so hard was it ?

Lo and behold , when I went back to class, R was standing outside the class .. Hmmmmmm , here we go again . I found out that R decided to be an ostrich today . SHe felt big and tall ( which she wasn't at all !!!) and she decided to put herself into a pair of ostrich legs ... no ,we don't have a pair of ostrich legs .. she wanted to feel how was it like, putting her head into a hole , like what an ostrich does ..


She found the perfect object .. mana ada lubang la .... She found a dustbin and in went her head and when my poor friend saw this , she freaked out and asked R to stand outside the classroom till I arrived .

R , R , what should do with you ? THis is not all ..... according to my sources , R ate papers also !! OKay R , after you eat your noodles perhaps I could interest you with the house specialty ..... paper soup , with a dash of pepper , some cilantro and sprigs of scallion and they are on the house !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Lambat " Loading"

I just don't understand how some people lambat loading to whatever that they have to think about or do .... I mean it's like this people, but correct me if I am wrong here .. The brain is only 3lbs and yet we walk and hang down our head like as if it , the brain weighs at least 3 kilos!!!!


Okay, here is the truth and I am sure you may have encountered it before . Now , I am not saying that I am a genius when it comes to listening and understanding . I too had my fair share of lambat loading as I was growing up , believe me when I tell you ..

In a meeting , or any meeting , I am talking generally about meetings and later you will see the connection of those who does lambat loading . It is okay to lambat loading when you are young but as you progress, we somehow or rather get rid of the lambat loading skills .. It's a darn good skill.. actually !!!!!!!!!!!!

During meetings ,I see many nodding their heads and it's not just a nod but many nods and one just have to look at those nodding thier heads would come to a conclusion ,that these people understands everything..

Not everything entirely .. too good to be true , right after a meeting and the moment you are out of the meeting room , here comes Bonita or Lolita , asking you ; "Eh, did you understand what was being said ?" I mean .. Whoa ........................ back up ! See , after everything they don't get it
So how long would a person "get it ?" Ah ... this is the lambat loading la I am speaking about .. nod , nod , nod your head till you also pening ...

After seven weeks they finally surface and say , " Oh , is that what you were trying to tell me ?"

Just don't do it , just 'Get it'...................... people .