Now I know and finally

Now I know that I have been loved and I also know that after six months I finally got it .. and how many times have I nodded my head to say " I GET IT" ?


Countless of times , I lost count myself . It seems that on that fateful day I went to another school to get something .... and it was there , that I got my answer . My answer was simply .... "DON'T GIVE UP , YOU CAN DO IT" . I may have got it then .


Through and through, I did not understand because my mind refuse to understand it . Why ? I mean why must it be so ?

I feel nice now knowing that there are people who are out there to help me and not to forget that there are people out there who are out to get me .


Okay , I am being silly again .. whatever it is ... I know I am loved and I wait for swords to be put down and we we live as one .

Change

Change of hairstyle , change of food intake , change of weather you name it and most of us are afraid of change . Namely ME !! Why ? Because I have lived in a comfort zone and too afraid to step out of it ...

Someone once asked me to step out from my comfort zone and I never knew that I was in a COMFORT ZONE ....I thought that since everything was going on like clock work in my everyday life , I guess that was pretty normal .

So how am I going to take that step for a better change in my life?
I could take baby steps which is not that hard , intial steps , will be a bit tough..
... Okay I have decided that starting tomorrow I will seize the day as it comes, not worry about anything , be the first to blow bubbles under water with my eyes open , get married and have kids and throw evvery caution to the wind and have a meaningful live ahead .... and finally learn how to swim !!!



Sounds easy enough . Let's see how I fair .....

Where ... ?

I tried to find you but I just don't see you around,hardly a word or a call and everything is silent.My heart breaks and yearn and yet you're too far away from me . Is anything wrong ? Or perhaps I may have said too much .

Where................?


I don't feel nice and my heart is yearning for a friend to talk to . Maybe someday we will both come to realise that we were meant to be togahter .


Where.............?


For now everything seems fine . I just wished that things were different . I miss your chatter and laughter .We have grown apart .

Where............?


Maybe this is not the right time , so when will it be ? Don' stay away for too long.

Where............?

Choose , choosed , chosen

Call it what you want and I am sure that each one of us were given the gift to choose . To choose from right and wrong and know that whatever the choices that we have made , there is no room for regrets .


For some , a choice is something like A , B or a C the list goes on . One thing for sure that every one of us deserves to choose.SO what is your choice? Having to stand at the corner while everyone steam rolls you or stand up for what you believe in and make that right choice?

So what is the difference between choosing and speaking up ?

Lean On Me

'..... the children fail because of their teacher '


Now, as we all know we need someone to lean on . Yesterday we saw a movie ,Lean On Me and Morgan Freeman acted as the no nonsense principal of the school . Strict to the core and when he spoke , no one spoke .. but one thing that caught my attention that , the teachers , no matter what , never gave up on ther students ... and I for one , felt like hugging all of them.


The show moves along and focus on four students,they skipped class,bullied everyone that got in their way .In one scene , shows the four students being questioned by the principal and the first thing he did was to get them to sing the school song.He waited .... and they sang acapella right infront of him .. he was amazed and so were we .

Lean On Me means to lean on someone when you need a shoulder... and when you're not strong .. Lean On Me means that no matter what, we will catch you when you fall.

'Cut , it's a wrap!!!!!!!!

During my haydays as an actress ... ahem!!!!!!!! Yes , I am an actor , well not in that sense ,not the pro type. I was choosen to act in the Christmas Peagent Play . I remember it so well . I mean ,I went through training just like everyone else .

My first role ; the inkeeper's wife . it was such a blast that I could not imagine , I went up on stage confidently and said my lines . I was in the most colourful garment and I felt important .We had special seats then , and we practiced hard . Then , a group of us went to Sri Cahaya for a voice over session .See how serious we were back then .

I took the role seriously even it meant that I have only 3 lines to say . I mean the inkeeper's wife . She had a standard to upkeep .
The day we were to perform, the church was packed .We were not nervous at all.

The second stint came about, when I was choosen to play a wife ... modern day kinda Peagent Play . Thinking back , I just don't know how I got up there on that stage . I am not a born performer but you could say that I enjoy doing many things . Perhaps I should add this to my resume .


I had the best times when I was up on stage . Power was mine and I had it all.The curtains are closed now and we make way for new talents. The show will live and go on ...

Sounds

The only sound I can hear right now is the kakak sweeping our block .Oh , and also a baby calling for his mother ... plus my mum talking and watching hindi series at the same time. I can also hear our visitor's voice hmmmmmm .....


Those are just some of the sounds and regular sounds that I hear . I hate ghostly sounds and screams . I would never watch a horror movie without some company around me .It's like I wanna see it and at the same time I am afraid. I would grab the nearest throw pillow and cover my ears and still watch the movie, with my eyes wide open !!!!!

But then again , having done all this, I could still get a shock , my heart rate beating so fast and all. Seriously , if you're planning on inviting me for a movie make sure it's a comedy or action .Anything to do with horror movies forget it .


I remember one time when we were staying in Brunei . My parents came down for a wedding in K.L. My sister wanted to watch a horror movie so she told me not to worry . That night , after the movie , I could not sleep at all . I kept thinking about the ghost with the long hair . I did not sleep the whole night . I left the lits on . I still could not sleep . I prayed and even said my rosary .

The next day , that's it .. no more horror movies for me .